If you put my grandfather in a room with God and gave him one question, he would not ask for the meaning of life. He would not inquire as to the existence of poverty or the vagaries of human nature. No, he would ask, and I quoth: Do you use Firefox? My grandfather, an avid watcher of our SpreadFirefox counter, claims to have personally converted the 4 million people in his “inner circle,” or what we call “Florida.” God would make 4 million and one.
So when I returned from the airport bathroom two weeks ago, I was hardly surprised to find him (my grandfather, not God) engaging the head Rabbi of Israel in a delightful conversation about Firefox. We knew it was the head Rabbi because moments earlier the man had been shepherded into the Admirals Club by six (6) police officers, and my grandfather asked one of the cops…if he used Firefox. Then he asked the cop who the man was.
I returned from the bathroom just in time to hear my grandfather say: “I use Firefox religiously. Have you heard of it?”
Religiously. To the head Rabbi of Israel. Wince. Wince. Wince. Cut to me stuffing my head between my knees, wondering if my grandfather and a Rabbi were going to get in a fistfight, pondering whose side the six cops were going to take, then wondering if my grandfather would evangelize Firefox to his fellow prisoners.
“Firefox?” The Rabbi stops and thinks for a minute, rubbing his beard. “Ah yes! The one that blocks all the schmutz.”
July 4th, 2005 at 2:37 am
“Ah yes! The one that blocks all the schmutz.” - genius!
July 4th, 2005 at 2:55 am
Oy, the schmutz I’ve said about you on Spreadfirefox. I hope your Grandfather is a forgiving man. Your shpiel reminds me of Margaret Cho’s mother in the bathroom before her shows telling everyone how funny her daughter is, “O my daughter, she very funny lady, very funny.” It also reminds me of Catie Curtis’s dad selling her cd’s on ebay. Your grandfather is really proud of you. He believes in what you do. You are very fortunate. Mazel Tov, Fox_E_Mama
July 4th, 2005 at 4:47 am
Lol, that was a nice one :), I should ask the local bishop if he uses Firefox too, he’ll probably answer the same thing. I’m surprised to find how many non average users are actually very pleased to use the burning fox :).
Hallelujah!
July 4th, 2005 at 7:54 am
That is wonderful. The marketing types should seriously consider it. It’s memorable, somewhat amusing and quirky, and it really represents how users perceive Firefox. It’s ‘The one that solves my problem’.
Time and again, they can’t remeber the name (”foxfire”, “modzilla”, “that other internet you installed”, “thunderegg”, the list goes on), but they remeber when it works like they want. You can’t get more entrenched in the users mindshare than by being ‘The one that solves my problem’.
Way to go!
July 4th, 2005 at 12:00 pm
may be he had seen this: http://mozilla.org.il/firefox
July 4th, 2005 at 12:05 pm
Is it a joke? I guess the head Rabbi of Israel don’t even know what Firefox is, but as I don’t know him personally, it is possible I am wrong.
Does he use the Hebrew version of Firefox? (http://mozilla.org.il/firefox)
If the Rabbi use Firefox, does it mean the browser is Kosher? ;-)
July 4th, 2005 at 12:10 pm
HAHA! Thats very funny!
July 4th, 2005 at 12:22 pm
lol!
Firefox — It blocks all the schmutz!
:D
July 4th, 2005 at 1:34 pm
HAHA! Thats very funny!
July 4th, 2005 at 3:00 pm
Tomer,
It’s not a joke. He knew what Firefox was.
-Blake
July 4th, 2005 at 3:10 pm
Hahaha! This story is just amazing! Thank you so much for sharing this! Is it unapropiate to ask aproximatly how old your grandfather is?
July 4th, 2005 at 5:52 pm
The promotion of Firefox runs in the family, your Granddad must be real proud of you, but the rabbi talking aboout firfox only explains that Firefox has arrived and yeah it does block all the schmutz!!
July 4th, 2005 at 5:54 pm
The promotion of Firefox runs in the family….
July 4th, 2005 at 6:06 pm
If I can be pedantic, there are actually two head rabbis in Israel: one Ashkenazi (roughly, the Judaic tradition of central and eastern Europe) and the other Sephardic (pretty much everywhere else).
July 4th, 2005 at 11:54 pm
Wow, enough people dugg this to make the digg.com homepage!
July 4th, 2005 at 11:57 pm
“schmutz” means filth/dirt in Yiddish :)
July 5th, 2005 at 1:08 am
Funny story, but hard to believe, as the chief rabbi would never admit he uses the internet (which is considered an abomination in those circles). See for example: http://www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-3087040,00.html
“I don’t know what’s Internet, I never saw what it is, it was never at my home”
July 5th, 2005 at 4:23 am
Funny story :D
Unfortunately, the head Rabbi of Israel is Sephardic, so he probably doesn’t know Yiddish, but the story was entertaining anyway :P
July 5th, 2005 at 4:55 am
Supercool! :-D
July 5th, 2005 at 5:08 am
“schmutz” means filth/dirt in Yiddish - and we have the same word with the same meaning in German! :-)
July 5th, 2005 at 6:11 am
Great quote, hard to imagine a priest saying that though, but a rabbi, I can imagine.
July 5th, 2005 at 6:13 am
HAHA LOL that’s awesome
true, true
July 5th, 2005 at 11:14 am
I first learned the very-useful word ’schmutz’ from my (non-jewish) plumber. It’s what he calls the disgusting black stuff that gets in your sink drain lines. Just the sound of it fit perfectly to the application.
Of course it also fits perfectly for describing much of the stuff blocked by firefox ;-)
July 5th, 2005 at 11:50 am
This schmutz blocking browser is 100% kosher!!
July 5th, 2005 at 2:09 pm
This is very important question :)
July 5th, 2005 at 9:34 pm
That’s a great story. I did a blog entry about it and the people who saw it all thought it was great. In fact, its mine and one of my friend’s new catch phrase at work.
July 6th, 2005 at 5:16 am
You mean… the Rabbi really tell your grand dad THAT quote? Now that’s awesome :)
July 6th, 2005 at 7:22 am
Well, I don’t know if I want to stop ALL the schmutz ;-).
This should be Firefox’s new slogan “The one that blocks all the schmutz.”
July 6th, 2005 at 9:56 am
Just to prove that the Chief Rabbi was abroad on the specified date:
http://shmais.com/pages.cfm?page=archivenewsdetail&ID=22216
July 6th, 2005 at 11:28 am
Should be “Ah yes! The one that blocks all the treyf.”
July 6th, 2005 at 5:13 pm
Could someone please make a button for this?
July 7th, 2005 at 9:18 am
You must be kidding me. That is too funny (& good) to be true! (But I guess it isn’t! ;-)
July 7th, 2005 at 11:23 am
SCHMUTZ: Means dirt in german too :)
July 7th, 2005 at 1:18 pm
http://img187.echo.cx/img187/476/firefoxrabbi4yo.png
There you go. A banner. I didn’t ask for his permission to quote him, though, so do as you see fit.
July 7th, 2005 at 2:40 pm
So SCHMUTZ is similar to SMUDGE in English, I guess
July 8th, 2005 at 4:26 am
The israeli press has articles about this event.
http://www.nrg.co.il/online/10/ART/954/441.html (”The Firefoxie Rabbi”)
http://www.ynet.co.il/articles/1,7340,L-3108626,00.html (”Does Israel head of the Rabbis surf by Firefox?”)
July 8th, 2005 at 5:08 am
OMG that is funny! Your grampa is really hip, and it’s so great that he’s such a big supporter of the things you do.
July 9th, 2005 at 3:44 pm
Hey, Blake, I’ve benn in Miami International Airport a week ago! Now I’m in Jax (jacksonville) and have a international english course of EF. :) I thought about you, when I arrived in Miami! Your grandpa is amazing that he supports you everytime and everywhere! This is very good (not just for firefox)
July 13th, 2005 at 11:35 pm
“Schmutz” (filth, dirt, *smut*) is a German word which is also used in Yiddish (a mixture of German, Polish and Hebrew).
It has a meaning similar to “tinnef” (a Yiddish word from Hebrew “tinnuf”) which is also used in Germany but nowadays in a meaning of “nonsense” (non-physical Schmutz ;-)).
July 14th, 2005 at 1:56 pm
The Rabbi joke is hilarious!!!
July 16th, 2005 at 2:28 pm
Hahaha. This is the best post I have EVER read!!!!!
Hilariuous! Keep up the good work! God I like your grandpa! Hahaha!
Cheers from Mexico >:*)
July 17th, 2005 at 4:56 pm
Genius :-D
July 22nd, 2005 at 9:39 am
I tried FireFox and like it… I think it’s nice, and not all that different from the IE I am accustomed to. They still have a little ways to go what with keeping up with newer standards and stuff, but not far from what I noticed. Still I stick with IE for most things because of being used to it and because the majority rules when it comes to designing pages. The concept of FireFox as implemented, widely used, and made so popular of a topic lately seems worthy of the rustle and bustle it’s been getting though.
Nice little story. : )
July 23rd, 2005 at 3:33 pm
funny post, Blake! Thanks for the new word “schmutz”
I use Firefox like I use my camera, which is a whole lot safer because I don’t get punched in the face! But my wife does smack me in the back of my head from time to time.
Hey Blake, Bill Gates dumbass face just won a spot on my blogs banner. He was one of my first posts a few days ago, which your readers might find interesting. I’m sure you’ve been keeping tabs on the dumbass.
Keep up the good work!
July 26th, 2005 at 5:11 pm
Hey Blake,
Speaking of family and their firefox zealotry:
Your cousin (H.Ross), is my new boss. As a longtime Ff user and OS advocate, I was delighted to find an office full of Ff users. I come to find out that she was evangelizing Ff to the entire Chicago office. Kudos on all that you’ve done and will do. It was only a matter of time until the older generation embraced Ff - who knew they could use a browser that actualyl allowed them to resize text.
July 27th, 2005 at 12:31 am
The question is not if FF is kosher, they question is if the Chief Rabbi of Israel is kosher, and by the way there are two of them, one milky & one meaty ;).
July 27th, 2005 at 12:33 am
Ever tried Maxthon? www.maxthon.com it not only blocks all the schmutz, but also the blotz.
July 31st, 2005 at 9:21 pm
HA! Awesome!
August 1st, 2005 at 3:52 pm
That is just amazing. Your grandfather must have a great sense of humor, and a lot of guts. :)
August 11th, 2005 at 11:20 am
“Firefox?” The Rabbi stops and thinks for a minute, rubbing his beard. “Ah yes! The one that blocks all the schmutz.” should be on the spreadfirefox.com page…
August 28th, 2005 at 10:05 am
I saw this one in Wired, this really ought to be the Firefox tagline.
September 8th, 2005 at 8:30 am
I know this is kind of a late response, but..
Well, there are two Head Rabbis in Israel at any given moment - the Ashkenazi one and the Sephardic (also main) one. Both of them believe that the internet is the root of all evil (that and pork).
Luckily, no one listens to them (the Ashkenazi one being questioned nowadays for both bribery and alleged child molestation) and the internet remains kosher :)
December 27th, 2005 at 5:11 am
Hahaha, this is genious! Now, if FF would only make me some gehachte leber it would be perfect!
December 28th, 2005 at 8:56 pm
Child molestation? Let’s not get carried away! He has been accused by some of sexual improprietaries but no charges were brought against him nor is he being investigated by the police on those charges. He is under investigation for some financial improprietaries. Again no formal charges have yet been brought. I am hardly a fan of the instituton of Chief Rabbi (it’s a political position not a religious one) but dragging someone’s name through the mud just isn’t right.
And yes this is a really funny story!
December 29th, 2005 at 7:59 am
“Ah yes! The one that blocks all the schmutz.” This is awesome, I couldn’t think of a better way to say it, and I think it can catch on. I’m going to replace spread firefox on my site to that phrase!
November 26th, 2006 at 12:39 pm
[…] Schmutz […]
December 3rd, 2006 at 1:21 am
[…] When I read this wonderful story from Blake I thought it was really funny and well written. […]
March 9th, 2007 at 6:17 am
WHEN I READ THIS STORY I THOUGHT IT WAS WELL WRITTEN AND FUNNY LIKE A NOTHER STORY THAT I READ. I THINK U SHOULD FIND MORE STORYS AND PUT THEM ON THIS WEBSITE. THANKS FOR THIS STORY. P.S. I AM SOME WHAT GERMAN BECAUSE OF MY MOMS SIDE OF OUR FAMILY. ARE U GERMAN?
September 26th, 2007 at 12:41 am
[…] Priceless: Blake Ross on Firefox and Beyond -> The new Firefox tag line […]
February 4th, 2008 at 5:55 am
great post :-)